PERSISTENCE
HEY, and guess what? Steveroni, (a.k.a. ME) "tech-help-a-roni" fixed his own Internet connection, and then the router went on the blink. Daughter C had a new router (gift from two years ago!) so I installed that shiny box, configured two computers, and we are ON, baby!!! I believe PG was happy also...I KNOW it! I was always the guy who BROKE things, not the one who mended them!
I tell you that life has meaning again. There IS a Santa Clause, Virginia...
Well, I knew that blogging had become my obsession--for at least a year. I spend so much time at this machine, and rob time from many parts of my life to feed the blog, Face Book, the poems, and daily AA meetings and service commitments.
What a phony, what a fake am I...to write about about my life of freedom, PEACE, serenity, love all and everything blah blah blah!
Even my violin playing has suffered somewhat, because I no longer find the time--even one hour a day--to practice. Fortunately the experience of many years has saved that part of my work--so far.
It has been two days since I have gotten into "serious comment mode"...and I feel guilty about THAT as well! Tomorrow is time to make an appointment with my favorite psychiatrist who prepares and serves coffee at Starbucks. Others call him "Barista". I call him "Doktor"....as in Doktor, save me from computer addiction, blogging compulsion, my own self-centeredness...and make me a quadruple espresso,no cream, etc. Forgot to mention my HUGE "caffeine-habit".
It occurs to me, had I not written this blog I'd feel lots better about myself. I would not have realized that I have all these "problems" all this crap.
But I will not drink alcohol tonight--which segues into another topic:
I tell you that life has meaning again. There IS a Santa Clause, Virginia...
Well, I knew that blogging had become my obsession--for at least a year. I spend so much time at this machine, and rob time from many parts of my life to feed the blog, Face Book, the poems, and daily AA meetings and service commitments.
What a phony, what a fake am I...to write about about my life of freedom, PEACE, serenity, love all and everything blah blah blah!
Even my violin playing has suffered somewhat, because I no longer find the time--even one hour a day--to practice. Fortunately the experience of many years has saved that part of my work--so far.
It has been two days since I have gotten into "serious comment mode"...and I feel guilty about THAT as well! Tomorrow is time to make an appointment with my favorite psychiatrist who prepares and serves coffee at Starbucks. Others call him "Barista". I call him "Doktor"....as in Doktor, save me from computer addiction, blogging compulsion, my own self-centeredness...and make me a quadruple espresso,no cream, etc. Forgot to mention my HUGE "caffeine-habit".
It occurs to me, had I not written this blog I'd feel lots better about myself. I would not have realized that I have all these "problems" all this crap.
But I will not drink alcohol tonight--which segues into another topic:
PERSISTENCE
As a member of Alcoholics Anonymous, I must address my truly favorite subject, if even just a touch:
Someone told us early this morning which was THE most important AA meeting he ever attended. (And right here I said to myself: "The FIRST one, Dummy"!) As it turned out, he said "The second one."
It would have been a simple matter to leave after meeting number one...but he came back the very next day, and did not drink between meetings.
And I recalled, the same was with my experience. One meeting only got me to think what a fool I was to BE there, what a waste of good "drinking" time. But something which was said to me, like a challenge (in my twisted mind!). Someone told me, "Well, Steve--all you have to do is stay sober and come back next week."
In my words, "stay sober" meant DON'T DRINK--that was how I translated it. And so, using that same persistence with which I practiced violin nightly in the cold wintry "studio" of the horse barn, I set out to "show them". What I thought was will power--well, it was persistence. And I've been persistent ever since that day in March 1974.
Someone told us early this morning which was THE most important AA meeting he ever attended. (And right here I said to myself: "The FIRST one, Dummy"!) As it turned out, he said "The second one."
It would have been a simple matter to leave after meeting number one...but he came back the very next day, and did not drink between meetings.
And I recalled, the same was with my experience. One meeting only got me to think what a fool I was to BE there, what a waste of good "drinking" time. But something which was said to me, like a challenge (in my twisted mind!). Someone told me, "Well, Steve--all you have to do is stay sober and come back next week."
In my words, "stay sober" meant DON'T DRINK--that was how I translated it. And so, using that same persistence with which I practiced violin nightly in the cold wintry "studio" of the horse barn, I set out to "show them". What I thought was will power--well, it was persistence. And I've been persistent ever since that day in March 1974.
Join me in being PERSISTENT today?
(That means SOBER!)
And let's LIVE today!
Peace, Peeps!
PHOTO CREDITS: Picture on right Picture on left
15 comments:
Tech Support?
you seem like a handy guy to have around! :) glad everything is back up and running and persistence reining
I am in awe of your ability to install a new router and configure two computers.
As for the other stuff, what blogging steals from our time, etc, well, take breaks. Practice the violin, call a sponsee. Just, whatever you do, don't stop blogging.
Hi Steve
Your persistence paid off in many ways!
Good to know all is running again.
Take good care and have a great day tomorrow.
Margie :)
There is Stevie the 'Jack of all Trade and Master as well!' Proud of you, Steve!
Glad you got life and internet fixed through your dedicated perseverance.
Joy and more joy,
Susan
Ha, good one, Mr.!
Missed you my friend, you know that and thanks for all the sweet notes during my MIA time.
Happiness~ and Happy Spring~ xxoo
Calli
Help desk... Can I help you?
No, sorry can you help me?
I've got a terrible cold, I thought maybe you could also help your peeps there...
You are a handy man, I see!!!
Two weeks ago I had problems of the kind with my computer , two days without internet (arrrgh..) and eventually had to pay xx euros...
Hugs Sweet Peep
Awesome experiences and honesty shared Steve!
You continue to inspire growth toward the Spirit of God and this program of action!
I've got a router?
Friend Steve,
Thank you for that wonderful comment, which comment has helped me to see....really SEE, insight into where I feel I am and the help that I do need. As we do I too tend to feel guilty weighing down those close to me with my whoes, aches, and pains....the guilt, drives me to ....well, these days just cry...
I did have a better day, a GOOD day, and I wanted to let you know, and thank you. I also revived the light in me through some processes of reading and writing and ...healing. And I hope to get myself back to 12 Step. I need it.
The temptations are so fierce, and I can't say sober is something I have completely been....yuck. So....I commit to do better, and to go for the help!
Thank you thank you....I have written something today,...for me, and for you and PG.
love,
mile
Great job on the ability to do the computer work necessary and of course the wisdom to know enough..LOL!
It all boils back to the serenity prayer for me, sadly I don't always hear it....
HUGS TO YOU
I am glad to take a break from the computer for a while. It is nice on the boat to just have the iPhone. But I do stay connected that way too. I am way behind in commenting on blogs but will catch up little by little.
Good for you for fixing your own, Steveroni. Waiting around for any help is like waiting for it to snow in July... He he he... fat chance of that, yeah? Good to know you're up and running again. Take care and chill, a bit... No one's going anywhere. :-)
Nevine
You're a guy who knows what he should be doing but I think you get a lot of positive things out of your blogging 'habit' such as spreading ES&H, communicating with others and writing creatively. That's all positive stuff, ain't it??
Persistence is one of the most powerful attributes in the world.
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