Humble Humility?

Sooo, we got fleas.  So what?  

PG and I had to leave the house 

for three hours while exterminators 

murdered millions of fleas.  Burt (cat) or Cat-Burt? had to go away for overnight, he'd been losing hair, 

started looking like a rat.  

Here we are in STARBUCKS blogging, 

can't beat THAT! 

We have two free 

Internet hours daily.  

And a coffee pot which is never empty!

ANNOUNCEMENT!  

Today October 20, 2009, I have lived 13,000 days without a drink or drug--how 'bout that?  How did I DO it?  I didn't drink...and I didn't die!


HUMILITY?  NO WAY!!!

Meeting topic this morning was "humility" and I got to hear lots of people--in under an hour--tell how they have little, none, or wish they had more humility, etc.  Since months and years have slipped (pun) by, I wonder that it's all been said and heard by me now, and I might tune out and live--this hour--in my own VERY pleasant reveries of people and places near and far away.

Then I vaguely hear some guy say, "Humility means I give somebody help or money anonymously"...humbly!? but deep down I WISH the Peeps would find out! So they might congratulate me!!  Nope, I say to myself, that ain't humility--but it's what I sometimes DO.

One time I (humbly) gave a down-and-out fellow a C-Note, and felt SO good for it, like I really could not afford it at the time.  Many years later, I ran into him, now sober about 25 years--and I fully expected him to come up and say "Thank you, Steve.  You really saved my life those years ago."  He is doing quite well for himself now, never married (after the first two) owns a thriving business.  I even entertained that he might choose to pay me back, pat me on the back--or buy dinner, or something?  NOTHING!

SEE where Ego gets me--EVERY time? And so, in later years I decided--and this WORKS, folks--every time I wish to "help someone out" financially or otherwise, I do it with NO strings attached.  That way I avoid concern with Ego/humility, a future resentment, anger, frustration, Pride, even fear.  

And most certainly it is an Ego-deflating action, which we alkies certainly need.  
Although more than ever lately it has become a source of spiritual growth.  I don't mean it is my road to sainthood.  I made a wrong turn somewhere back there--grin!

My road is a simple one now, one foot in front of the other, don't look back too often, never look too far ahead (like, more than an hour or so) during a given day.  Look at tomorrow only as far as my commitments and appointments take me.  Be ready for ALL those to change any moment.  Sobriety allows me to live like this more and more. It is NOT a boring life, it is no longer a "difficult" one.  

Age has its rewards, and this life of minimal anxiety, peace, sharing, observing nature, stresslessness, and living, giving  and loving, praying and meditating, is becoming more a habit, than a willful daily action.  And to do these things with ENTHUSIASM is one of my keys to being HAPPY!
 
OK, Peeps?  Ya still with me? Sober and all? Let's grow together!  I have lots of it to do (growing!)...l love y'all!  PEACE!