MEDITATION?? LOVE?? AGAIN??
Today was/is the best day of my life, and I'll tell you why. But first, do you know what was the best day in my life yesterday? It was........yesterday! Not surprised? Well, I am. But I have come to a conclusion (at least, for today!) that each and every day--since I got sober--has been/IS the best day of my life, each one better than the day before. The result must be such, so long as I am working our program.
Even when things seem to be in that old familiar chaotic mode, or disaster strikes, there is usually a "God-reason" of which I'm not aware. A growth day. Why are so many of my days "growth days"? Why cannot I have just a couple days OFF, as in "off from living life on life's terms"?
True, I do have a few of them now and then...and you know what? THEN I begin to feel guilty, for having such a peaceful life, such a (temporarily, anyway) trouble-free existence. Funny, I have to "be busy" to justify my happiness.
The answer could lie in meditation. I don't mean the "working" kind of meditation, where I (Ugh!) clear my brain, stop all engines, close down the throttle, cut off the air. I do not talk here about the meditation in which I picture scenes from the lives of Old-or-New Testament folks, so as to ponder the conjured mental pictorials.
I seek--and sometimes nearly arrive at--the point at which my mind and my heart just want to LOVE my God, just wish to BE with Him. As loving friends on earth might sit with one another in silent contemplation of their past connections. Thoughts could include their personal history, their longing to be with each other, their willingness to wish the other nothing but goodness, happiness, and serenity, their absolute trust, their true knowledge that the other is 'for real' (faith?), and not the least--in fact, more the MOST--the true LOVE which binds them together for eternity.
Such is meditation unto which I strive, yearn, and for which I pray.
And for that kind of love, I will stay sober another day.
And you, too, I love.....and the God within you!