DRINKING ALCOHOL TAUGHT ME HOW TO FLY
THEN IT TOOK AWAY THE SKY

Sunday, May 2, 2010

A FEW PERSONAL THOUGHTS


SCATTERED THOUGHTS

 

"Things" don't bug me. 
Any more. Much. YEAH...RIGHT! ;-)

I started to write simply that "things don't bug me". Then I got to re-thinking that statement. Oh well, so things really DO bother me? But it turns out that only ME bothers me. Most other "things" are what and how they are supposed to be--usually, that is.  

That elusive word in the Serenity Prayer: WISDOM.

For many years conceptual *wisdom* escaped me, though I tried.  I DID try! Wisdom to Know the Difference. "Why is it so much simpler for others",  I thought. I fought it and thought it.  I gritted my teeth and tried--like some people pray, making it a strenuous activity. So I stopped that. Guess what? No longer concerned, the wisdom-to-know-the-difference was granted me.

So now I have wisdom (come on, YOU know what kind I'm meaning here--grin!), and working backwards in the Serenity Prayer, it is now the Courage to Change which is giving me so much trouble.  It was easy to own that courage to change when I did not know WHAT to change.  Damn "wisdom!!!"

VISITOR from Chicago

This morning at a meeting one of the dozen visitors from "up Nowath" announced he was from Chicago.  A little later, one of our Naples Peeps, a regular said, "I got sober in Chicago". In my own formerly-habitual manner I wished to say, "Well, I got sober in Chicago. Once. For about two hours! Then I woke up, and started in on my vodka again."  Well, so much for resolution. Now, where did I stash that bottle?

On alcoholic "COMPARISONS"...

Ya know how many of us compare with one another's drunk stories, and sober stories. Some say, "Oh, I was better than HIM!"  Or..."I drank more than HER!". In other words, the old "I'm better than" and "I'm worse than" syndrome. Well, for a long time now, I have felt--truly--no better nor worse than. I am only the word "than"....(please do not ask me what I mean here--I do not know--grin!)

The word here is not to compare, but to Identify--I now Identify with the THINKING, I don't compare with the DRINKING--so important, this.

Last, certainly not least--for today--STAYING HAPPY

Peeps do not disturb me much, no matter what they espouse, or say--except on weekends...well, also week DAYS, I guess--grin! Actually, that was a lie--I am bothered less and less about what peeps think or say about me...because I have found they don't think or say ANYTHING about me--ever! Only wish I had discovered that 70 years ago!

I am free to live, to come and go almost at will, to be sober, to choose, to be at peace, to pray, to love, to roam, to ride that big scooter ("slow down big boy") and to be nearly always HAPPY! I have said for many years, that "www" we used to need in our Internet addresses--that "www" stood for "What a Wonderful World"!

Love to all, and Good Night...Dammmmit, it's late again (sigh!). And let's stay sober today...OK
?

19 comments:

steveroni said...

www

Caroline said...

You the man! And I am born and raised in Chicago (or as pronounced sha-ca-go). My Mom is going on 30 some odd years of sobriety...it's a journey to say the least. And it's takes a world of strength.

peace.

Katherine said...

When I read your writings Steve I find it hard to believe that you are 70 years of age because your words exude a youthful zing but the wisdom of your words can only have come through experience. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us & I agree with your definition of WWW - What a wonderful world ...indeed!!!
Goodnight Sweet Dreams!!

Larry said...

always sober here steveroni. I'm stopping by to say thanks for the visit and for the comment
Larry@"This Blog Of Mine"

Findon said...

Steve this was a good post, very thought provoking. As I have gone on in sobriety I have started to feel that I haven't really understood the programme as intended, except stay away from a drink. Perhaps the road gets narrower as we get older and continue to try and understand the prayer.

Kim A. said...

For me, wisdom came when I learned to just stop. Stop thinking, stop reacting, stop the busyness, and just be. In that moment, the answers come for me. Your post today was funny and full of the good stuff without the fluff. Thank you, dear Steve.

♥namaste♥

Kristin H. said...

Hey Steve. Just stopping by to say "hi!"

The Turning Point said...

My ears always perk up when someone mentions Chicago. Made most of my first years sobriety in the Windy.

Love the "toddlin town' and all the villages camped out around it.

Sometimes the meetings sound like "I can top that story." especially about having the "baddest ass sponsor."

Dulce said...

Www
a wonderful world it becomes when one reads your posts...
Take care peep.

Joe said...

good words!

Susan said...

I've always been taught that "knowledge is power" and "Wisdom - is knowing how to use the knowledge we have." In other words, a lot of responsibility comes with each new thing we learn.

So THAT'S why the Ostrich puts his head in the sand! And helps us be a little more patient and understanding on the days when others, or ourselves, act like Ostriches!

Syd said...

Courage to change the things I can--which is me
Serenity to accept the things I cannot change--everything else
Wisdom to know the difference--mind my own business and understand powerlessness.

linda said...

i must be tired cause i got here and didnt have a clue what i was going to say ... well said- was one....you always have so much, can i say it? wisdom in your words, you are wise, wiser than your years, you know that? k...about that little red paper we discussed and i cussed cuz i have been down--again---but now maybe this week will be up and we will print and send and it will be pretty on that exact spot you are thinking, well you and she are thinking. you thinkin? ;)

Dulce said...

Hey Peep,
Thanks for your last comment on my blog... I am glad you like that. BTW I haven't changed any color, but YOU have...are you copying me?

Well I don't mind... LOL
I must say I love your new template and color and header too... {But I really dislike(loathe)the picture in this post... SOrry}

{{{♥}}}

Brian Miller said...

nice. we used topray the serenity prayer at least once a day at the treatment center i worked at...its the things that i can't that i struggle with at times...

www

Ily said...

You're a wonderful man and I love that song about the wonderful world!

Have a wonderful day, my friend!! :)

chitowngreg said...

Someone once said that ours is a simple program for complicated people. I think no matter how long I'm around, it's still going to come down to getting the basics right. Thanks for the reminder!

Jingle said...

you amazes me with your ability to inspire,
nice to read you today!
cheers!

Bananii said...

Yes, I found out recently although I did not know I knew :) that saying you CAN and you WILL change things you NEED to change in order to be a better person, or happier, or less mediocre is easy when you do not know what you need to change.
Or when you keep your eyes closed even when they were supposed to be wide open.

But, hey! I am glad now you can say you dont really bother about what other say about you and... it is curious, I'd never seen it before like they dont think or say anything about us ever.

Like everything they say is at some point a lie, because they will never be able to judge correctly.
They may not know our past, so they can't understand our present... barely they can talk about our future.

haha "www" nice one!