DRINKING ALCOHOL TAUGHT ME HOW TO FLY
THEN IT TOOK AWAY THE SKY

Friday, August 8, 2008

FRUITI TUTTI


FRUITS AND OTHER DIETARY NEEDS
by a FRUITCAKE

For breakfast this morning (at 4:30 AM Eastern, it's what I used to call a late supper!) I ate some fresh strawberries. As a child, you could not pay me to eat any kind of fruit, except bananas (Hey Banana Girl, I'll buy all you harvest). These straws are luscious (is that an onomatopoeia?) berries. Thing is--now I'm wondering, "What ELSE do I like, which hitherto had been on my 'do not put in mouth' list?"

Funny...long ago, strawberries were a no-no, while a little taste of muriatic acid was, well, just what I needed. Mostly I only sniffed it, but sometimes I yearned for that "burn" which could only be satisfied by sipping something with the term "acid" in its name--my wonder drugs. Also it was a habit of mine to put my thumb in my mouth, and huff and puff, until I passed out, then awaken a few seconds or moments later, feeling dazed, but otherwise refreshed. At least I told myself that. To this day I do not know if that's what they called "huffing", but it could well be. Back then, on the farm, it was my OWN idea, though. So much for wonderful self-medication.

Maybe that is why my memory these days is shot--long term, short term, and mid-term. Or could it be those several years when I bought a $1.99 gallon of White Port every afternoon, which would last until the next afternoon. Sometimes, in combination with vodka, beer, and Southern Comfort, I'd get a gallon of White Port TWO days from the last one. The store clerk would then ask if I had been ill. Now WHAT might EVER lead him to think that?

Through all these times, I spent ten years as a violinist with the Cincinnati Symphony Orchestra, and played around the country at different festivals, did a stint in recording studios in NY, played one year in Birmingham AL Symphony, et alii.

Later in life--age 32--I found my true career. All my friends were there, all those beautiful bottles--my only true friends left on this earth. That was before those same friends turned against me.

And I did become in those eight years, the best bartender my boss ever knew. I know that's true, because he told me that the night he fired me. (I had been sober nearly a year!)

8 comments:

Lou said...

Amazing you could play in that state. I would be laughing (giggling) like a fool after one drink. Or more like an idiot, which is why I don't drink.
Your gratefulness for putting it down shines through every post!

Princess Powerless said...

Good morning, Alky! There are a bunch of foods that I hated as a kid that I now love... salmon, salad, Swiss cheese... You should definitely try a nectarine or -- if you're really adventurous -- an Ugli Fruit. They look weird, but they taste like Heaven.

Shadow said...

oh i love your sense of humor.

strawberries, grenadilla, cherries, a whole bunch of others too i'm sure, i used to eat as a kid, but with so much sugar there was hardly any view of the fruit left. have outgrown that habit though... i'm sure my dentist would have preferred i didn'nt, hee hee.

...maybe store clerk too was intoxicated???

...and a violinist?!?! nice to get little snippets of who you are. you still playing (is that the right word??)?

you go have a super weekend now!

Syd said...

Hmmm...I remember sniffing airplane glue when I was making my models. I didn't know anything about sniffing glue or that it was bad. It just smelled really good to me. Amazing career that you have had.

TraceyBaby said...

Fired after being sober nearly a year? That just doesn't seem right!

It's raspberries for me, Steve!

(Nice name...that's my trouble-making son's name)

Shadow said...

the riddle? YOU GOT IT RIGHT!!!! the answer IS 'no' as in answer to the last line 'can you guess the riddle?'. apparently, 97% of harvard graduates got this wrong. 84% of pre-school kids got it right!!!!

have a fab weekend!

Shadow said...

you, dear steve, were the only one with the right answer. feel proud! and nothing wrong with childlike thinking. actually, i think it's better on some level. simplifies life tremendously... and get's you to solve riddles, heee heee heee

and thanks for the nice comment. i appreciate it. likewise, i love reading your posts toooooo.

Laura said...

I'm so impressed that you can spell onomatopoeia! I'm not sure but God may have spared your cells more than you think!

Hugs.