DRINKING ALCOHOL TAUGHT ME HOW TO FLY
THEN IT TOOK AWAY THE SKY

Thursday, July 2, 2009

FIRST AND LAST


THE FIRST DEADLY SIN IS THE LAST ONE TO GO

The following is a response--one hour ago--in comment form to one of us bloggers. Its appropriateness as a possible blog stayed with me, so here goes:

I just love those words and their meanings: Pride and Ego--that must be what keeps
New Englanders staying there for the winter--grin! Summer?



AMENDED THURSDAY MORNING: One of the comments below addressed "What was it I did not say?" How perceptive! And how rude of me, to hide truth--which is...I was really pissed off when I wrote the following blog. One of my friends had been attacked in a comment, by a self-appointed guru, and I wanted to tear into his flesh.

Reminds me now, of a friend of mine who went into Judge-ordered Anger Managment Class, and he said, "Boy, that Anger Teacher really pissed me off!"


So now ya know--and I know something: for me, never write a blog in anger, because nobody but I will understand it. Thanks for reading, my wonderful peeps!

THE BLOG:

I see truckloads of it online and in f2f meetings. I am first to recognize it. Why? Because I'm still full of that crap myself. Else how would I know? It doesn't smell, taste, make noise, and it has no 'feel' to it. Well...maybe a queasiness?

But it DOES show itself to whoever can see. And even the blind readily see it, some better than sighted peeps.

I'm still new to the blogs, just one year. My understanding is this is NOT the place for me to counsel, advise, belittle others, or for me to get well OR to find God. I become well by working the steps. I find God, the Great Reality, deep down within me--and within all others--for, in the final analysis, that is the ONLY place He can be found. (BB, page 55).

I love these blogs, I can be myself without intimidation. I can learn at my speed. I can live, laugh and love here--and I DO!--to my heart's content. I can publish, or reject. I'm "in charge" of my blog, so to speak.

I get my AA from the Big Book's first 164 pages. I get my spiritual growth from wherever else I am led. I have adult supervision for all my questions about living life on life's terms. Usually, my adult supervisor will point me to a page in the Big Book--unless I first point him to a page. (He's only sober 31 years. I remember back when I had only 31 years! ---Private joke!)

I'm grateful to the extreme and do express that in AA group activity, and one-on-one sponsorship. I talked with two sponsees today, one more later on, he lives in Colorado on a mountain.

This sure sounds like a lot of "I, I, I," to me, but--don't forget--in the beginning of this message I put out Pride and Ego as my chief defects. And God and "I" are working on those--the timetable is really up to Him. I've written wayyyy to much for a 'comment'.

Bottom line here, for me the blogs are NOT where I TELL peeps what they should do, or should not do (unless they ask, or unless I know them pretty well). Otherwise, I can just about write whatever I feel is appropriate if I respect others' rights to do that, also.

I do NOT have to read certain blogs, and I do NOT have to publish certain comments--especially if I believe they make the commentator sound like an asshole. (Some of us do sound like that ya know? -grin!)


TODAY'S TRIVIA

A silk fiber is triangular. It reflects light much as does a prism. That's why silk cloth shines.

Hey, if you bloggers thought for one minute that you were gonna get away without something else from me, you are sadly mistaken:

Peace, and LOVE, from
Steve E

Trivia taken randomly from Boyd's "Curiosity Shop"

19 comments:

Shadow said...

yes, the pleasure and freedom of blogging. read who and what you want, respond to whom and what you prefer, discard that which you don't.

Andrew said...

Pride and ego. That which keeps us separate from others and from God.

dAAve said...

here, here

Mary Christine said...

Hmmmm. I would sure like to know what you aren't talking about.

Gin said...

Please don't ever reject one of my comments Steve. My pride and ego could never handle that! (Smile)

Jess Mistress of Mischief said...

Oh boy, I know I KNOW!

humbling words you write because I look and then I look into me, and I SEE and I don't like it, and I don't want it, and I ask God to overcome it, and you...are one of the vehicles he uses to point it out.

Thank Steve! Thanks for continuing to tell the truth and be a part of this wonderful community that is so near and dear to my heart.

I'm so full of gratitude today! So FULL!!!

Good thing that the Gratitude can fill the places in between the sh---tuff and push all that out as I continue to move with those who are working their way up.

I keep hearing the same steady sound in my head now over and over ..."Drop the yoke and let ME do the work, just follow MY lead Jessie, it's easier and less painful that way..." And I don't have to strain any muscles to do it.

XOXO

Lou said...

But Steve-O-Experienced--

I want you to tell me what to do!

Ann H. said...

Pride and Ego are my middle names, Steve. I didn't even know it without tons of prayer and now I try to get them off me like a sticky booger but its so hard sometimes. I'm told it gets easier. I'm hoping that there's the miminal amount of pain for the growth to take place.

Ed G. said...

I remember I used to have pride and ego, but then I fell...

Glad you could say some things that needed to be said...

Blessings and aloha...

Gabriella Moonlight said...

I work hard to rid myself of pride and ego by working to be honest with others and allow myself to experience and share my many mistakes...it usually helps!!!

Love ya
G

Tall Karen said...

Thanks for the amendment...I was beginning to think I was the 'only' one who didn't get it!

Syd said...

Thanks Steve. I like what you wrote about this being your blog and your being in charge of it. I was called on the carpet by a fellow blogger a couple of months ago. I won't go into details but the email to me was too much--judgment, anger, etc. I acknowledged by role and redacted the offending stuff. I wish now that I had not because I didn't find it offending at all. Sometimes I need to remember that I can write what I want and if others don't agree then that's okay.

Prayer Girl said...

Love you,
ME

lana said...

i'm currently reading 'Reflections on the self' by j krishnamurti and there is a good bit on pride..

"The feeling of 'I' is in its very nature a sense of pride."

the I is just fine.. it's when you add all the other to it that it gets wacky.. i.e. "i am special person", "i am _______". when the truth lies in simply I am or at least that is what i see today.. ask me tomorrow and who knows, i may say something totally different.

Carol said...

Thank you for everything.

Atiyanna said...

Hmmm...I just love reading your blog, and your comments, and your advice.

~A

Zanejabbers said...

Pride and Ego. Mine fight all the time for the lead in the day. And that's fine, it's when they turn their attention to me - oh hell. But somehow I manage to get out of the way, I guess it's called experience. But sometimes I don't and then I have to hang my head in self given shame, hoping no one noticed. I should just pick up the Big Book and knock ;the hell out of them, but that thought comes afterward.

Cat said...

Here is to having a great weekend Steve! Happy 4th to you and PG!

Robin said...

Pride and ego: I try to let go: everything I read is all about Robin;-)
Thank you for reminding.
What I wonder; do you (or someone else) know more about addictions? I mean is there any study about AA and for example how to deal with eating disorders? Some things I read in your blogs reminds me about handling issues myself (pride). Maybe people with other addictions can benefit also from certain steps? (I am not an (sober) alcoholic)